HahaGerlehongLeha

itz been a long time. updates!!

2009-11-03T19:17:00.002+08:00

well its been a long time since i ever touch this blog of mine, totally forgetten about it. i was so occupied with my occupation now na barely have time for anything of my own. sometimes i wish to have a time of my own, but i cant. guess this is one of my life's sacrifice to have own business.
NO LIFE!!!!

1. i got a whole new experience on how to manage a shop n the business itself. i learn more about zahir. i learn more about myself too. about the customers, why they act that way...Every dae got something to do. topping up the stocks, customer service, merchandising items in shop, safety of shop, well basically everything. Managing money is very important, u cant play with bank you noe.

2. Recently did kayaking for camelot with sam, me, farhan, sky junior n robin. 5 of us and 1 expedition to coney island with hougang pri. its been so karat la since i did kayak, hahah now back to ground at last . i missed being in it the activity, the sport and of course the frens n collegues.

3. Turned down the offer of police officer. a step away, cant attend the sing bonding. ignorant police, they gave me last min info on fri, how u expect me to be ready woth my 2 sureties on mondae the 2nd nov? and the caller can even suggest me to withraw my application and she passed the comment GOOD! to me. fuck up siaa... i will never think police as high as i thought b4.
Already so racist look at the color of skin. u think we malay stupid. u think u guys chinese got power> hello! the commands are in malay the national anthem is in malay! mind that...

4. im adjusting myself to this new life of mine. bedok to sin ming so far, i started to stay at shop but my parents made a commotion a few weeks back. made me cry cant stand it. they accused me of sleeping with my boyfren at shop. already my father n my uncle came to my shop for the first time. never give me bleassings straightaway raise voice in gangster manner like want to fight with me. wanted to talk to me for a while. ask me to come out of shop. i was alone how can i left the cashier unattended. they just don understand. i hate my family but not my motther of course. she has been caring and alwaes trust in me . whatever i did she alwaes support me even though she was not totally agree with. all they wanted was to shout at me n zahir, accusing my boyfren that he has been keeping me. but acutally i was the one who chose to stay at shop cos its more convenient for me. rather then to wake up so early in the morning waste time for the travel time. n at nite i can sleep more time if i stay at shop. but my parents worry to much that im a girl la losing my virginity, oh man i noe how to take care of myself. they still don let me be independant of myself. how am i going to stand with my own legs by myself.

zahir urging me to get my pdl then my driving lessons then licence. hahahz we bought a van already for the company to do delivery services, cant wait to drive man@ my cousin already got her own motorbike n she's my age, gosh im so jealous thaat she is already a private road user, go anywhere so accessible, not like me restricted following the public trasport.

zahir has made me even stronger. he opened up my mind n thinking, Thanks to him, im what i am now. we,re planning toget married cant wait for that time of my life whn i finally be a wife. im glad to serve him, now he finishes off his study first then we be married, a simple one that im loooking for, a wed in the mosque with just my close relatives. n maybe another celebration at bangladesh, his home town. and by that time my life will be more meaningful, a gd muslim, a gd wife and i will be very close to allah SAW insyallah@ thats my ambition. i will achieve it. i don want to be like malays nowadaes. follow stupid western n they become stupid malays too. never solat, tattoos all over, they are so sesat with satan. i pray for them to realise thier mistakes and come back to the light the right path b4 the world ends. ameen.

thats all folks, still at shop now... too free liao, haaah take care dear frens, everyone one dae will create his own wy of life. wish u all the best.

stressssssssssssss week!!

2009-06-26T20:19:00.003+08:00

hey yall! its been along time since i ever touch this bloggies and update sorry FAN!!! hahaa aniweis lots have been happening to me to name a few...

1. my urata bicycle got stolen when i parked less than an hour at tampines.URGH!
2. and i bought a new bicycle which i love the most and have been using it as my transport to get to caamelot to work! i boight my bike at sungei rd for 90 BUCKS! so cheap.
3. i got 2 accidents with bike at road. almost cost my life but thanks god he still loves me lotszzz! i was left with minor cuts and bruises!
4. im still with my babay boy!!! Zahirul islam I love u so much!!
5. i gained more xperinces whn kayaking was put down to lots of under pressure especially with JAy thanks babe!
6.my mum got to operate on her knee just recently i pray for her best!
7. i was struck by a ghost at camelot at 5.17am. fri the 13th!
8. my npcc was doing gd and we had just run a camp successfully! thanks sameer and all for making it happen we had FUN!
9.i love ZAHIR even more each dae!!!
10.and guess what peeps IVE GOT MY OWWN BUSINESS TO RUN come support me at sin ming rd blk 22. me and my boyfren is running the entire shop. that means i cant go shopping cant go cycling cant go kakyaking oh man! cant meet my best buddies and cant spend time at npcc.
11.i still love ZAHIR even more each dae even when we argue about wha to put in shop!!!

haaahha thats all folks! taking carez!
signing out.... roger and out!

2009-02-01T20:56:00.003+08:00

hey peeps! its been a long time since i update about occurances my life. It has been i would rather sae daring of me on some circumstances. i gambled alot of risks here and there but im glad that it happened for the very first time and i was able to cover myself. thank god. been very busy ans slack would sae. Most of the common things i did everydae is to wake up late afternoon then shower, find job, then call Him and meet him for dinner, spent time in da room ,(wei. do nothing ok! don think dirty!!!) hahax! thats how it is. other than that, ive been busy with NPCC UNIt and also my freelance job at CAMELOT!!!. but i m really looking forward for full time stable career to start wif anytime soon.

Im bored with almost a year not getting a"real" job. i feel the pressures from family and my own financial side too. i cant really enjoy much. No savings, everything out, nothing in! oh man. im hahging people like a jellyfish. wandering ard here and there.

well thats it for now, shall try to find more time to spent here. take care!

2008-11-02T13:02:00.000+08:00

Ahoy there! hahax, time for some updates.well recently i bust with my driving lessons at eunos big carpark. i signed up with the company called Soon TIen.sumthing like that i suppose, the driving instuctors are most make of elderly peeps which is a gd thing, they are very patient, calm n cool. Expertised ma! so i got mine. i addressed him as MR tan. he really reminds me of my late grandpa.

aniwaes this is what i have done for the past few daes!

27th oct --> i spend my time with zahir. meet him in the morning about 11 plus, waited him to finish shower and we make our way. iTs deepavali day so alot of ppl at serangoon area. My dear Zahir surprised me! he bought a gold chain for me and wanted to pay the rest of amt and get it on the spot. but unfortunately, he cant collect it on that dae as the shop closes at mustafa centre. well it didnt happen so i didnt bother about it anyway, but then, as we about to proceed to the car to pick out the helmets, his grp of frens was there ans he spontaneously introduce me to all of them as they saw me with him. heheh! felt awkward and shy but it was ok managable for me as i am frenly n didnt matter in making new frens so zahir ask them out for a cup of tea!of course he blanja lol! so i sat down, they talked for a while, then at last we proceed to his car and guess what he told me to pick up the helemts while he go solat zohor! oh man! zahir argh!!!!its not like im angry with his commitment to solat, but he really like prompt 2 things poppingup. we r supposed to catch a movie and that was his idea, now u c what i mean, he change his ideas so fast@! anyway i waited bout 20 mins then we off to get the bike and make our way to THE CATHAY to watch SAWV. show starts at 1615pm we were 1 hr early, so we roamed ard n thank god it rained whn we already reach the building, so u noe smokers and the rain. what else, he smoke la, i stand waiting for him to enjoy his puff, then we ate some paus at 7 eleven then off to catch the movie. show was nice i love it, he slept inside, well he's tired i understand! he massaged my neck cos its a strain sitting at the front seat last corner.
Then we off to another smoke by him, wipe the bike, then off to serangoon then he gotta work at nite. oh man! i will never have a full dae to spend time with him! aniwaes i follow him to CCK to pick up MR LAMBRI then i tot of making my way from CCK to home. but he invited me and drop me off at outram to make my way home, that was nice of MR LAMBRI. hahx! woah! thats it for the dae!

28th Oct --> Met erny n suhailah at UBi drving centre. i book my FTT, will be on 10/12 @ 0430pm. suhailah went for her prac3. me n erny head to paya lebar for a walk at CITY PLAZA. i bought 2 dresses 1 $10, the other, $6. nice n cheap. of course gd quality! [don b jealous!!!]then we head for dinner at KFC9 [zinger meal] then i meet zahir at serangoon for like 45 mins b4 he went to work! then i follow him to tanjong pagar, i make my way from there to home!

29th Oct @ 6pm---> My first lesson --> Paid enrolment fee of $30 + $36 (lesson fee),i was really nervous at the start of it, but eventually everyting starts to be in place.he teach me the controls of car, im taking manual u c, so alot have to practised on especially the synchronisation of my legs n steering and the views. i really feel like sitting in a cockpit! then a few rounds on changing gear. reversing to park then lesson end after 1 1/2 hrs. i make my way to ITE SIMEI as zAHIR got his night class there! i waited for him till about 0845pm he make his way out from class, met me, i drive the car for a round in car park then we make our way to my carpark, i make my way home afteri massaged his arms n shoulders. i pity him! tc dear! i wish u well...

30th oct --> 1st ever COMBINED UG CAMp at PYSS! im involved in it. from 8am till 9pm! its a dae camp. zahir didnt let me go as u noe its a waste of my time according to him la. so i went on my bicycle to PYSS then teach them drills n tent pitching. cool dae lots of things happen. relly opened up my eyes big big that the standard really has gone somewhere else. oh man. but it was a great deal, diff activities by all othe UGS,
SJAB -- First Aid, CPR
NCC -- Orienteering
NPCC -- drills, tent pitching
GG -- gadget making
BB -- adventure Quest

31 OCt -->i went for lesson 2 for my driving. 0100pm till 0230pm then i make my way to meet zahir at lavender.! hah which after i make my waay home from serangoon. todae is the last time i c him for the week.. i missed him lotzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz!

01 nov -it was a prompt2 plan. with jerly, she supposed to meet glenn at PP but he was sleeping. hhuhahua@ poor jerl she make her way to tampines mall to meet me as i have planned to finish my resume then off to tamp mall to get a ling bag at a low cost and i got it at $11. urban. haha! its pink! ok lol, we took 65 to harbourfront VIVOcity to meet her another fren. esther and watch a movie SING TO THE DAWN at 7pm. bought popcorns, nachos set! haha! then off to candy empire to get my chocolate then off to LJS for dinner then make my home bus 30 with jeryl then 28 to home!reached at 1215am. hahaah! wat a dae...full of jokes n laughter!

02 nov --> gathering with the gold buddies, MAS, JERyl[in church now i guess] n FIZAh,going out later with them at 0430pm at orchard mrt. wonder what will we do there! i dunno what to wear?? update later i guess! so much for now...

tata titi tutu!!!

2008-10-24T19:58:00.001+08:00

Oh yeah! at last i gotta find time to bloggy babe! hahax. a lot of things has happened all this while and i could make myself free to blog cos i got a lot of events these few weeks.

well i just came break camp todae at CCAC CAMELOT as a GI. i took Peirce Sec 2 adventure camp. well i think the camp is a well done one. the campers was an obedient one, the boys were the noisy ones, they talked alot, the gals was the quiet one. Amazed? this is the new generation thats evolving in singapore. oh gosh! its terrible, much more worse. but i believe that as long as they noe whn to be attentive, there is no reason to talk unnecessarily.As usual, i learn something from this camp. i became the campfire IC with bear! i think i cant make it as a campfire IC, dunno why, maybe im still not used to the Camelot atmosphere and not confident at all when leading the songs. in any case, i did it, i didnt back out and i don really care if others laugh at me cos i noe this is where i learn and pick up as i go along. i hope i can do well as a campfire IC and tune it my own touch whn dealing with it.

and guess what when i was about to break camp, during area cleaning the last activity for the kids, a bunch of ping yians with Gabriel came for a KOP [kayaking oreintation programme]. and we had a talk me n Gabriel the overall CCA in charge for pyss [he's a teacher]. we talked about the upcoming UG camp. and several opinions about pyss internal matters on ccaa/ im very happy cos finally all the hopes i had n the wait for someone to initiate this cca thing has finally being looked into. oh i feel my drive being flushed in to me again. im so full of this. but i thnik my zahir will feel unhappy wth me doing this things cos he don understand the passion i have for my npcc unit n the rest of the uniform grp ccas in pyss. he regard this as wasting time n i should be loooking for job insteAD!

oh well. thats all, tata titi tutu!

taking care#[don want hives again]

The campers were a typical bunch of students. They were so concerned whn asked to sit down on sandy area. they will use thier feet n palms to sweep it away then sat down at the clean area. i think during the camp they really learn the meaning of RUGGEDNESS. There were leaders who stepped up to lead and gathered the rest to come to decisions like a grp name n even the campfire item. One regret that i have for this camp is that i really didnt make enough time n effort to recognise their names. anyway i really enjoyed myself.

Sat-->> 18OCT2008
well; so much for the camp itself, recently i had my area 10 ATC (NPcc) at CAmp resilience Pulau Ubin. sadly, i left the camp on 2nd dae morning with the help of iskandar, [Thanks bro!] he sent me out by van if not i have to wait for the 1st shift of teacher officer to come which is like about 1pm. thats too late for me to go seek medication at bedok poly since they close half dae on SATs. hahax, actually i got HIVES, the dae b4 i went to camp. so it got bad when i got to camp and i stayed at medic post the whole nite. what is HIVes? HIV? ahhax choy!!! its an allergy reaction on skins. its kinda heat rashes very itchy once scratch u cant stop. thank god i got ghangha{sorry if i spelled it wrong} she nurse me and kept me well throughout. i was soaked to caLmine lotion mins after mins. all the more i grabbed attentions from those passed by the post and i became a white Indian. [red indian?? get it], haha everyone was concerned. i really felt at ease with colleagues of mine showing care n concern about me. i really felt at home. they are mt family! thanks again to all. sorry i didnt make it n helping out for the camp.

well ALONG THE WAY waiting for bumboat and other 11 passengers[cos bumboat wont leave if there is only 1 going off unless i pay full 12 passengers amt which is $30. thats too expensive for me. im short of cash on hand cos i need the rest of it for the doc later] i met a bunch of camelot ppl. so surprised! there was JAy, wayne, chloe, win. 4 of them doing safety support for a unch of sch kids touring ard ubin for half of the dae. hahax! the orange ppl. then after a long wait i finally saw a few that wants to leave ubin. thank god, at last i got a ride n i paid only $3.

then-->

My teacher officer, mr shahid was very kind enough to pick me up from changi and sent me to the docs as soon as possible and still he has to make a trip to Ubin for the camp. i really appreciate alot for his help. cos of him i got early treatment and i can rest more time at home. The doc gave me just a medication. and i consulted him for less than 5 mins. so i make my home n slept till the next morning.

my zahir was really about me. he smsed n called me frequently for the nite. and i told him the situation, report ma! hhaa nah!

2008-09-17T17:29:00.002+08:00

Well well, here i am again. Just went to CAMELOT to submit my application for upcoming L1 kayaking COACH. yesssa! finally im on it. But it happens so coincidentally. i didnt even plan for it. oh well. grateful that all these while i have been active there so this is my chance to a greater length. thanks to CAMELOT i am able to upgrade myelf in the mean time.

Im stressed out all these while. got a problem that im facing now. which is JOB??? i gotta find one, most of my frens are doing something and earning well also. but not me im clinging ard like no one's business. my parents haven been nagging at me especially this yime round. they asked me qns like "what if one dae im not able to provide for the family? " thats what my father posted me. thinking about it, im also worried, ehat i should to do? i must get a job somehow even it means im under qualified. but i don like a office jobs as i don like to sit ard for so long time. haiz!

mY INTEREST is either POLICe, civil servant job OR venture into Outdoor line like kayaking, doing camps, high elements ans more like that. but in the long time run , can i survive in this line of mine.will it help me to secure a stable imcone throughout the years?

all i want now is to get a stable income for my family, when everything goes well financially and back to normal, i will want to further up my studies or rather opening up a business with zahir, hahax!

anyway, i booked my FTT test already yesterdae at ubi driving centre. ITs on 21st OCT at 0540pm. ive got to study up and get prepared. oh well, if only jerly is in this together wif me! i miss her alot. wonder how she is doing out there!

zahir made me happy and smile yesterdae. he smsed me saying that whn he is free, he will bring me down to bazzar and walk2. huahuhua! i like.. waiting for that to happen.then we can get COUPLE DRESS for hari raya. ahahz!

well these are my plans for this week:

THURs -->> break FAST wif ERny n frens @ NTU [iftar] >> meet erny at NYP 0530pm
FRI -->> L1 KAyaking Coach theory lesson 6pm till 10pm >> to kallang. buy break FAST foos 1st
SAT -->> L1 KAyaking Coach prac lesson 8am till 5pm >> to kallang
SUn -->> L1 KAyaking Coach prac lesson 8am till 5pm >> to kallang

hope to meet Zahir sooner or later! miss him so much!

taking care...

2008-09-10T23:17:00.003+08:00

wohohoh! its been a long time ever since i got touch on this dear journal of mine. well peeps, my laptop is gone case. Luckily Zahir bought a new laptop and its just for me! i really appreciate him! so anyway lots of events have been happening to me this past few months and im grateful that either way it helps me to be a better person and to have a learning experience. thts life babe! now is ramadhan month, fasting month for all muslims in the whole world. oh gosh ive been wanting to be a gd and a better muslim but its just that im still trying to find the meaning of it. i don want to abide the rules just for the sake doing it, i want to abide it with love and willingness. zahir and my mum have been helpful alwaes trying to urge me to pray and be a better muslim but its just that my heart is still nowhere to settle down to.

anyway ive been tricked by zahir yesterdae! full of DRAMA and scenes going on. Long story babe! but im glad that at the ens of this commotion i learnt that in a relationship there must be no lack of trust as it leads to anger and enmity, i don want that to happen to me and zahir. i really treasure him lot. Dear i love u so much!

well simply put , thats all for now a short update, time for me to get rest.
'chioz!

2008-08-20T23:33:00.002+08:00

Its been awhile since i update here! Well i have been busy feelancing and just finish NATIONAL CAMP 2008, a big event i must say.. It WAS great being a part of the event. I met and worked with a lot of experienced personnels, each having thier own specialty. Of course life at camp would be best with erny ard, my best buddy, we tag along everywhere we go. Im lucky to have her and our FIs throughout the camp. They filled me up with joys and laughter. There was nothing boring about the camp when having them ard!

These few weeks, my laptop was down, it totally shut off and i cant even on it, luckily there is my hero, ZAHIR, my dearest one, he just bought a laptop and he gave me willingly for me and my family to use! i love u darling... U are so thoughtful! i will not leave any scratch on ur lappy k> hahax![he's particular about that] i think he loves me lesser than his new lappy

Well time is running out, ive got to sleep for now, energise for tml's activity which is kayaking 1* course assesment day for the sch! Going to work via cycling, so i got to charge my energy for it.

Shall update more soon enough!
tatatitiTUTU!

2008-07-08T13:13:00.008+08:00

This was on sat 28th June 2008!
CYCling with Erny, my very DEar fren! siszta!

We really didnt meet for a long time and this time spent togetherwas worthwhile we explore the nature of ubin and at the same time we did catch ups on our lives!

Thanks erny for making it possible!

Luv ya!

2008-07-07T21:48:00.004+08:00

Guess wat peeps! todae is my 9th month anniversary with my sayang Zahir! im happy n sad at the same time. Well i really understand that he is working hard enough to make the best of himself here in Singapore. His aim is for ppl to work for him in future.. he does nt want to work for ppl in the near future. I really like his determination cos i noe he will achieve it. He's not like others, really determined and noes where to head to in life... he spent all his time now with his work as a driver of toyota corola picking up n fetching engineers to the sites all dae n nite. i really pity him, he didnt take his meals at the right time alwaes late for one, he alwaes have like 2 to 4 hrs to sleep only per dae... he gets back ard 3 plus am and wakes up everydae ard 0630 for SUBUH prayer then off to work...

But 1 thing i really salutes him for is that he prays no matter how busy he is... its something that im really ashamed of myself that i don have that devotion yet...Haiz things are not like last few mths b4, i don get to spent time with him anymore maybe i c him like 2 to 4 hrs once a week...i really miss him alot, i hope he misses me too as much or more thn i miss him.. haha!

but todae i really questioned myself abut me n zahir n Our relationship...how far has it gone too, todae is a special dae but he makes it seems like todae is just another normal dae, no wish from him, he doesnt show any signs that he cares n treasure this relationship...i want him to prove to me that he really loves me and this relationship that we have.. i love u zahir! pls see me thru, grant my desires...so that i noe u really not taking this relationship as something NOT important...

anyway, im just glad that i have finish the 4 dae 1* kayaking course for NAnyang JC 1 peeps... thank god its over its tiring for me as i cycle back n forth.. thigh muscles were used for me to get home or to work. arm muscles were used for me to kayak and to impart my knowledge to this wonderful peeps! glad that all make it and learnt something useful that they can relate back to their lives and the challenges that awaits them.

Its been 4 mths plus since i slack from graduation.. i really want to get to be a part of police force...waiting for its call seems foggy for me... its been a mth plus since i went for interview... what my parents n zahir saes its true.. what if i cant get thru? am i going to wait and waste time just for this? Zahir saes that if i work right after i graduate, i could bring home at least a thousand plus times 4 mths, i should be able to have some savings.. oh i wish i can do something about this soon enuf, i don wish to waste time just like this, my family is not well enuf, how long can my parents last for the income n the basics that we need... i think its time for me to contribute to my family.. i wish my family is well off.. if only i come from a family thats rich like others of my age... if only my father was really working hard to make my family a better place... he's lazy! i hate him for that. alwaes aim for average, as long as its enuf its ok, he doesnt want to earn more for a better life...

oh all are ifs... why think of what has happened and things that cant be done, i got to think of what i can do to feed this family of mine... this moment i really want to get back to Allah and start to be a gd muslim... a gd person, a gd one for everything....i really want to be one...

2008-06-20T18:34:00.003+08:00

This few weeks, i have been going thru a lot in my life, things that i never expected, i cant believe i dealt with it, thank god zahr was there for me ...well not all the time...but i appreaciated his help and concern he shows. well im glad the dark clouds are over, but the future is still uncertain to me.

My parents have been stressing me about income...im still free and easy even after i finish my sch...zahir too kept blaming me for being too free, money, money, money well then again it makes the universe going ard<>

Rite now, im facing problems with my relationship with zahir, u noe whn both parties demand what they want, it gets tough to fulfill each other whn both wants tis thing called understanding...Zahir is very busy indeed, well although he's not a businessman, he works like all day n niteevery single dae, most often he will be at serangoon after work and continues to be there till 1,2,3 am in the morning...bcos of this, i don get to c him much often, i REALLY REALLY MISS HIM ALOT, i yearn for his time to be there with me and spent it. things aret the same whn we were newly together last time. last time for the first few months, the dating period, he' not that busy, i meet him almost everydae in a week like 6/7 daes.... now its rarely for me to even meet him up..

Often enuf, almost all the time, i was the one who who ask him whether to meet or not... giving it a thought. i juz realise that all this while after all the months we have been together, he had never been the first one to ask me out, it has alwaes been me.. now its no wonder that things gone worse... i was the one crazy for him, not him... does that mean he doesnt love me?

understanding? demands? i alwaes stress my cadets about voicing out what u want, but after voicing out what u want, well its difficult to grant it then...oh man, saying what u wan is a gd thing cos only then, ppl will noe what u want, but what if they cant accept or even grant it for u?

Zahir thinks that bcos im not working and im carefree, i have all the time in this world, thats why i want to c him like anytime, the fact is all this while we met recently but i was merely tagging along siting in the lorry following his ard doing his stuff, not our stuff.. do u call that spending time? well yes generally i was there , he was there too, but we didnt do things together, i merely tag along and see and wait till he finishes his work, and after that he sends me home.. thats it nothing more...

whenever i ask him out, he will start to compare th malay community and his. saying that i wan him to follow like the malay boys bringing their gals to window shopping, catch a movie la, go hotel la, eat dinner la... how unreasonable! isnt these are some ways to do activities together and spent time just for the both of the parties? thn what does zahir prefers to be called as healthy activity for a couple?

i really hope that i can reach him and make him sees my point of view and fulfill it...cos i really miss the times whn we really spent together nt doing each other things, but just two of us doing things that we are happy with TOGETHER...

2008-05-12T09:07:00.002+08:00

tHE pREvIOUS wEEk!

mONDAY->5TH mAY 2008

I went to BHG @ Bugis JUnction only to walk-in interview in the sales line WIF ERNY.But she got to go off earlier and i got late too by the INTERVIEW. I was so fed up as the months before i've been slacking at home doing nothing really...most of my frens are werking full timers while i wasted my time on part time job that is irregular. wHILE waiting to be interviewed after i fill up the form, i was thinking about my life and my directions on it. Can i achieve success in terms financial wise so i can help to release some of my family burden....? Diff question if u ask me... I do not wish to waste any more time, i need to get a stable job and start saving up.The world is getting competitive so are the people getting more demanding as ever...Its true what Zahir told me, im ought to find a JOB! at least temporary so i can some money for myself to pay my bills<>
Anyway, i was being interviewed and they told me to wait fer call latest on Thurs!
So after which, i went to meet Khal at her place and we chill out at MAc fer a Bite, then to her place to slack, i played wif her cat n the KITTENS, we Watched several movies. her mum was kind more then enough to actually prepared some food like the NUGGETS, the HOTDOGs, TUNA, BREAd. IT was A Bite Snack! yUMMy!

I left her plaCe at 1125pm, i WENT HOME At 1150pm.
---------------------------End of Dae ---------------------------------

TuesDAY->6Th May 2008

Well, well ,well its tuesdae i guess what i met khal again, by rite we planned to look fer jobs but u noe, she snored till 2pm in the afternoon! hahaX! so i met her up in my sporty attire t-shirt n trackpants, went to her place and cool SHIT i never did expect to make a new fren, well its her aUNt YATi! haha... Khal needed to pay the bills so we actually went to search for cash deposit POSBank somewhere near her place, but its was spoiled and we ended up walking to TAmp Inter to actually make direct payment at SingPOST! hhaz. Well, walking we do chat too.. alot of catch up between khal n her aunt Yati! ahha i joined in too... its was KEWL! Her aunt is Sweet! really SHE DOSENT FIT TO BE AN AUNT YET.
Then i make my way to see Zahir only to go to Serangoon, he was doing some business of his!
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WedNEsDAY->7Th May 2008

Todae is out 7th month anniversary wif Zahir! On this very dae, Zahir was working as per normal and he also has his practical sessions @ Ite SimEi. i waited fer him to finish his class and we went to Serangoon to eat dinner ahaha! nah, we did nothing much on our special day!WElll, i don really mind if we are not celebratiNG it as long as we remember it that is eenuf for mE!
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thurSDAY->8Th May 2008

hehe! i jux remembered that my pay is out at Camelot. so Guess what, i make my way to Camelot to get it! sO that i can settle my bills...i went out at ard 3 plus as i could only collect the pay at 4 pm onwards but b4 1800HRs! so i took the bus 14 to tanah merah MRt Station and waited another 25 mins to get onto the bus 35 only to reach the tanah meRah ferry terminal to walk another 20 mins then reach Camelot. Woah! wat an exercise! i was SWeaty<>
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fRiDAY->9Th May 2008
For today, I was abit busy, early in the morning I woke up just to get ready to fetch my little sis who is very mischievous like a monkey! She finish her exam todae at 1030am, so I got to be there b4 she can even come out of her sch. Else I’ll be in my “white eyes” if I slipped away from her..So I got to the bus to mrt to her sch! Walla, im there by 1025am. Its UNBELIEVABLE cos I make my way out from home at 1005am. Thank god I actually walk fast and run to Coral sec…So after picking her up, we walked pass WhiteSands and oh man , I saw pierre cardin bra n underwear set fer only $12.00. Damn I cant miss this offer, I bought 3 sets of it, and 3 BOXers for my sisz n me! After which, we took bus 17 back home…

But I got another plan too todae to rent my graduation gown fer the graduation ceremony which is on 21st May 2008. Duh! So I met khal at City hall with her sis n her “GERl” n “boy” to make out way to NYp. God damn it! I miss NYp so much. I kept saying in malay ”Nyp da gemuk!” which means NYp has become fat since I left the sch! Hahaah Crap!
Well we ended up later at NYp mac only to eat the cheapest Meals of Mac in singapore! Then we off to somerset Centrepoint to jalan2! Then to john Little and I got myself a $9,90 Surfer’s paradise ladies shoe! Its was kEWL!

And then I make my way to Eunos to meet Zahir, he picked me up from there , I got to KFC but Zinger meals fer my mum n sis then he sent me home so I got change to sporty looks with my adidas shorts to roller skate with Zahir at East Coast park!
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SatUrDAY->10Th May 2008

Todae is my 1st training for NDp motivator at ite Simei, woke uo at 7 to meet Erny in my neighbourhood only to walk to ite simei … We had breakfast 2 eggs 2 toast and a mio fer $1.90. Then the training began. We took time to introduce each other, played the squirrel, tree game and then the big matters like sizing of costumes, and I took juggling as my profession later at NDp. Man, to juggle is damn difficult.. the trainer said PRACTISE, PRAcTISe and PRACTISE! Walla… sad, I didn’t meet Zahir todae he was busy @ Serangoon!
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SunDAY->11Th May 2008

For todae on sundae I woke up as early as 9 just to get a surprise from Zahir. He ask me out to roller skate with him. So I got ready we went to ECP. The roller skate area near Mac was full of diff ages of ppl fom children to adults… it really open my eyes about what skating is all about… cool SHIT! Things were fine till Zahir made me mad! He made a fren there and this fren of him offer his a cigarette, Zahir has not been smoking fer a few daes now and he make me mad by wanting to smoke! And I told “NO, No, No” that’s what I utter from my mouth. Whn things didn’t work, I gave him sarcasm by saying “Go la smoke, smoke”
And I skate out of that park. Out of his sight for gd… I went to skate to other areas for a moment only to release my hot fumes n cool me down. Luckily the sea breeze was nice to enjoy, it really tame me back. And I make my way back to the park… that fren of his was gone and he was sitting down at one side. He called a lot of times “Dear, dear, dear”
I pretend that I don noe him…finally after a few rounds of skating, I stopped there beside him to replenish myself and he started showing me the “rokok” stick. I ask him for it only to break the stick into 4 and gave him back. I didn’t let any chance for him to smoke. No way! I got to be stern enuf to help him hinder his addiction of smoking…and then I followed him to his werk place to pick up the workers back to kaki bukit worker dorm and then to serangoon where he pissed me off again.. he left me alone and I got to wait like as if the sky will fall…but the touching part of it is that, whn he was busy out there, I called him to tell him that I got to go to my father werk place to pick up satay my mum ordered and he readily agreed. I felt touched whn he willingly stop the things he need to do just to follow what want.. oh I hate him to love him!wahawhah! I bring him to c my father, haha the reactions was ok as my father is busy werking… so in the end we collected the food and im on my way home. He sent me home, gave me a lot of kisses on cheeks and said thank u fer breaking the stick.. hahax!

That’s all folks!
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2008-05-07T18:33:00.004+08:00

Well well well, its been some time since i blog and update on my daily routines and events that happens to me recently. Sorry, but ive been xperiencing some disturbance from....well not spirits nor ghosts but MY LAPPY~ thanks to ma bravery to accept a file sent by Kimo thru msn pic12.zip... now my lappy got the virus, and whenever i online, the msn did crazy stuff like the windows of my msn contacts appears and blinks on the bar sending them a pic.zip file.. so guys if u got that from me, its me, i didnt send u guys anything, its the VIRUS. So sorry guys, one of my victims that xperienced that was Diyar... haha he laughed at me saying that i got the virus... oh well.. kewl shit.. niwaes...

Todae is 7th may 2008. and also its an annivesary date of my relationship with Zahir...7 months together..."Dear, i wish us all the best in the future challenges ahead, whatever happens, i love U darling! We have been tested by alot of situations, about our trust on each other our commitment towards each other, and a whole lot more...but thru all this, we have become stronger and each obstacle has made us wiser, more patience towards each other, more mature in handling th problems and obviously less childish! hahax! u open my eyes and enrich me to be a better me! i LOVE u Zahir...alas, HAppy 7th month annivesary of our enrichful relationship. Thank you for being able to be patience to me and my childish behaviour..."

well, we just heard a speech rom Ms Saleha Salleh, a bride-to-be for the groom-to-be Mr Zahirul Islam... A round of a plause pls fer the very touching speech by her.. hahahahaahaha
CUT THE CRAP!

Wahaha! niwaes recently, ive been looking fer jobs odd jobs ler for time being to earn some income...and ive been slacking with Khal too at her house and eating one of my fav, the choco WAFFLE at somewhere near her house! cool shit...well choco rite, what u expect, got the color of shit ma@ haiyo!hahaha<>

thats me n her at her house.. slacking to watch movies on her lappy.. shutter and khabir khushy khabir Igam, a production of malaysia malay movie.. haha romantic comedy n dramatic.. sad man! made me cried n focus the story, til left her house at 2330hrs on tues that just past...

well thats all folks! till then taking care.. love ya peeps..!

Wat ive done...

2008-04-15T11:15:00.004+08:00

Well, its been a while since ive touched and update this bloggy of mine. Lotd of ppl have been commenting on me on the updates that ive not been doing.. hehe sorry frens! here it is...

ive just turned __ this yr! hahx! Its [@)].. get it, decode it urself! The cake was from a company that ive been working for... NJ FAITH DAKOR!

well recently i graduated from NYP, haha (im a graduand now!) and has been lazing ard at home, work as a kayaking instructor and this few days, i have been seeing Zahir, my dearest most of time.

Alot of ppl asking who is my boyfren for now. ok ok, don be shocked, but he's a Bangladeshi, a holder of WP in Singapore. Reccently he has just came back from Bangladesh to Singapore. Well u noe, Singaporean's perpective on Bangla men. Often thought as a lower status as most of them are often cleaners of our blks and they actually do the dirty works like fixing a pipe, engineering sides n constructions. But have we ever wonder without these ppl willing to do this jobs, Singapore wont be able to come this far! As for rite now, do u noe the F1 formula nite race , the one Singapore is eyeing to host for, the back scenes, ppl who actually doing the place and fixing the constructions of it, its THEM, these ppl that has the skills as a construction site worker. THey are the ones!

Cool shit.

Anyway,drop the subject. Ive been seeing my dearest one, pity him. He just came back to Singapore, he didnt have the place to stay n no job initially. But i was so happy that he did find a place to stay now, and he is so focus on getting a job. i wish u well dear! May u find the right job soon! hahax!

And he did bought me a BEnggali suit from Dhaka! it was nice, red n white as if im celebrating our NAtional Day! haahx[ thats the one below im wearing!]

As for me, im working part time as a kayaking instructor, im enjoying it as i c diff kinds of students of all over Singapore. Cool shit! Not bad earning too im supposed! Well my saturdaes have alwaes been for Npcc Camp Resilience HRC...oH I MISS nyp times and my buddy mates...

Hanging n still flying...

tc~~

.hahagal.

2008-01-30T12:51:00.000+08:00

HEy peePs!

I'm in sch now, stress so much about project, Tml having BIo exams. todae suppose to set aside time to study and revise.Todae too, my dear Zahir going to his night class as usual at ITE SimeI.

Aww! I miss him lots! He is the first guy ever in my life to see me every single day without fail for nearly 4 months now!

Soon its going to be 4 months of us being together, this coming 7th. A whole lot of 4 months with a lot of enriching experience i had with him. We've been fishing, eating dinner together every nite, gone to so many places whn i had the chance to follow him while he's working! Saw monkeys at Bukit Timah.

I short he has been good to me! Never loses his temper whnever i accused him of being disloyalty behingd my back. For all my childishness n foolishness, he endured just for me!

I truly treasures him as 1 of my valuable persons i have ever met in my life for now.

Haix. so much to talk about him but just cant finish it up here! hahax!

Well my project has to be done, exams coming up pretty soon, soon after all this im graduating! OH yesSAH!

Here i will change my life n fate + destiny, fulfilling all my reality dreams i have.

Tata Titi TUTu... da di du!

2008-01-29T11:47:00.000+08:00

This is me. Construction site may what u think of when there is helmet as a headgear.

Hahax, well this was taken when i was having a break. I was at Pulau Ubin, specifically at NPCC Camp Resilience. I came to volunteer out for A19 Sec 4/5 HRC(High Rope Challenge) last saturday,26/01/2008. Which happens to be one of my fren's relationship anniversary. HAHax!

As usual, i make my way down to Changi Village Jetty at 8am, but not to forget to get my STANDARD breakfast which is Teh Halia (Ginger Tea) + Peanut pancake.

Journey of the day starts whn i took bumboat from Changi to Pulau Ubin. This time round, there were 2 GC(Gurkhas) helping out too, Warden was there [Glad 2 c him!] + Erny [The crazy gal] + MUS [The MUScle man]. We went in the uncle AZman's van & went straight to NPCC Camp Resilience.

Along our way there, cadets, CIs of a19 were walking excitedly towards campsite.
Upon reaching, we went straight to conference room [room for HRC trainers n instructors] and settled down for awhile.

Soon we got our standard briefing by warden about the manpower distribution of the elements to be in charge of.

Then, straightaway, get my body equipments like seat harness & my headgear, this YELLOW safety helmet lolx!

Doing the double flying fox element, which is located a TCP, 21 metres above the ground, ~= 7th Storey, i have got to get my neccessary equipments to be used on the flying fox like GLIDERS, AUTOLOCK CARABINERS, ROPES, and eventually make my way to TCP with my buddy, YIk Mian and setup the safety lines...

Well, Im 21 Metres above the ground, was at TCP. I was doing despatching for flying fox, the scenery was great out there. U really can see the sea, the land opposites us, Johor. I can see tiny participants like a tiny ANTS on the ground when i was up there. HAhax.

This is budak kecik and MAWi from malaysia! He swam across Johor Straits all the way to Pulau Ubin just to do flying fox! Hahax...
They were one of the participants to experience the Double Flying Fox...

Thats all folks, thats how i spent my saturday away...Encouraging the cadets of NPCC to overcome the fear that they have in them and to CONFIDE in them that they able to do IT...

Tata TiTI TUtu!... Da Di du!

Today is 24th January 2008, Thursday

2008-01-24T16:14:00.000+08:00

Hey y'all, its been a long time since i blogging. Well catching up all rite.
So many things happen to me in this few months. During the Ramadhan month, i met my boyfriend!

There was one night, there was light ok! hahax [Np Song], i was standing as usual looking at various ppl walking at the bazaar. I was at the front of the shop, the shop was selling the fake flowers for decoration purposes and at the front of it, we were selling fresh coconut for a dollar n fifty and can drinks for a dollar. As i was saying, i was standing at the front of the shop and it happened that the coconut cutter went to the loo to release himself. So i just guard the area as there were cash hidden.

Then there was a guy suddenly stop out of nowhere, stopping awhile in front of my shop to buy the coconut.Well, its not that its leceh to handle such a simple transaction from a customer, but the thing is the coconut itself need to be cut professionally before given to the customer. Ive not no expertise in that! I swear! Oh man...

So i didnt want to show that im incapable of doing it, so i pretended and have a try on cutting it, this guy he was standing curiously waiting for his coconut, with his helmet hang on his arm. I tried all methods but it was up to no vail. At last, this young man volunteered to cut it. I was so shy and embarrased that i failed to do it.

Whn the cutting was done, he taught me the tips n some tricks, he paid the amt, he took a sip n drank it. All happened at the front of the shop. The thing is he was still there, not moving an inch. And he kept seeing me at a distance, i don feel that comfortable as i was expecting him to get rid of there...

My boss was in the shop back there, she went to the front questioning me about this guy. She thought that this guy is a fren of mine. Hahax! i gave a small laugh, and said no. To my surprise, she actually interacted with him, asking him questions like his name, his address, what he's doing here in Spore.[As we can see his not a Sporean]. My boss was so clever, she introduced him to me, and i was left stuck in a corner, cant run anywhere now but jsut smiled and play along the conversation.
She went to ask him if he is able to fetch me to n fro from werk to home and vice versa. THIS GUY ANSWERED READILY! Oh man, how can i trust this guy i just met to send me home on a bike<>?

Well, the shop closes, he still waits outside, Once done, he sent me home. It was a moment i spent on a bike with a stranger sending me back home. He KNEW my address lolx because of tis, THANKS BOSS!

Im Confused!

2007-07-20T14:38:00.000+08:00

Every moment we shared together was a great one. I miss him like crazy when we were apart. I thought our relationship was a clean sheet piece of paper. Full of originality and not like other relationships i saw before around me.

I love everything about him. His integrity was there, his character just suit me. He is really one of a kind. A thinker. A type of person who analyses person's behaviour good enough.Good enough fer me. i noe we can werk well together. But because of circumstances and the situation at that point of time. I broke off with him. Sleepless nites i encountered fer the past 2 years. I yearn fer him, his voice is all i want to hear. Got no guts to call him. Waiting fer him to interact back with me...
It seems it didnt occur. For 2 years, i live a zombie life. Thinking of him every now and then. Hoping that i coincidentally meet him at his void deck whn i went cycling with my bike back then.

Everytime my close frens saw him, they "report" to me. I felt so unlucky not to get to meet him. They sae i should move on with my life. Find someone better. Someone that can cherish me.

Till i get to noe this guy from a Hari Raya Puasa Bazaar in Oct 2005. We met 4 hours later at 4 am in the morning @ Bedok resevoir Park. And i got to noe that he was 38!!! argh! he seems young like a 28 yr old.

We were together then, I learnt a lot of things from him. Ppl sae i became matured in terms of my thinking. he opens my eye to see alot of things in this life. We went thru ups n downs together. We give each other moral support all the time as i am just a student i cant possibly give financially.

he supports me in whatever things i do. We shared quite a number of common things together.He was a A* person in terms of moral, character and the way he thinks ! hahax<> very loyal. Every gal would want him. thats fer sure.

Its just that he's 38 im half his age. Its hard fer us to come together in real life. In his life n mine, it will never intersect as 1.But we lasted fer some years together till i met my LOVE back.

On 11th July 2007, Monday<> i was in the bus at berth whn i saw him queuing fer his 225 bus. i felt the urge to do something.. CATCH up with him. Suddenly , my inner fire was lit up again. i suddenly just ferget about my guy.
I alight on the first stop and took taxi to be at that particular bus stop where he will pass by. Indeed he was there in the bus whn i took it. He smiled at me. That was so innocent. His smile can just lighten me up. I felt happy.But it just fer a while till he alights. I tried to call his house number but i don dare to press the call button...

ARGH! till i reached my block whn i made a call. We talked as usual fer about 30 mins or so. It went smooth.Not tat i thot of. My eternal fire rose up again....